help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
