Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Randomize