i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
