Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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