Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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