Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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