was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
