allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just took my morning after pill in the library
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
