super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
