Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
