Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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