PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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