Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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