im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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