the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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