i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
