OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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