Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
