This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
