She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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