dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just high enough for therapy.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Send help, water and tortillas.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
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