Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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