Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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