Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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