At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
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