Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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