i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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