So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
