I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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