I just made out with a guy for $7.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Randomize