Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
