Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We have so much sex to catch up on
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
