Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
