Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
