I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
