How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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