You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
