Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
