no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
