I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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