seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
