Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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