So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
