i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
