It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
