White coat. Heels.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
