Quick, to the slutcave!
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
