How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
