Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
