he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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